13.4.14

# 47 || "Be careful, this may be a dream but you can still lose your head."

“Dreams are convenient, one can go anywhere.”



The sea is a good place to forget everything.


 I’ve always had the most magnificent epiphanies when all or part of me is submerged in water : whether I’m elbow deep in dirty dishwater, half-asleep in a bubble bath or diving ( head ) feet-first into the bright blue ocean. 

What I’m about to write, I’ve known for the majority of my introspective life but have only recently been able to consciously contemplate it and speak about it aloud. While I don’t know when exactly, from an early age I realised it would be very hard for me to fall in love. With another living, breathing soul. It’s incredibly easy to love a sunny Sunday morning, to lust over the sensation of take-offs and landings and foreign airport tarmacs, to treasure your belongings and wonder what you would do without quality company and friendships you’re so sure you wouldn’t be able to live without. Emotional love isn’t difficult, but cerebral and corporeal love is a complete mystery to me. 

When a #foreveralone future is looming not ludicrous, it’s hardly laughable but you have to make it so anyway. Do you ever feel like you’re living your life in limbo? Like each and every decision matters so thoroughly that it’s easier to wait in the clouds than rise up to the sky or fall back down to earth. My interim solution is to celebrate the small delights that life awards you. To hold everything and nothing so close to your heart that the emotional impact isn’t even up to you anymore and it’s only you who know that. Professional vs. passionate, cool vs. kind, impassive vs. interesting - you don’t even have to question which I think will win in the end, and what I believe is the most important. 

If you're the kind of friend you'd be so lucky to have, trust in that and hold yourself in the highest esteem you possibly can without allowing your ego to swell like a wave. Love without fear or shame, and give freely. Sometimes all you can do is ride the roller-coaster and trust that everything is impermanent, and accept that transience applies to both the good and the bad. Nothing is perpetual, you’ll be sad at some point, but it can’t rain forever. 


( je vous promets )

xo, 
A